New Old Things

I realise there's been a deficit of memoir lately. What can I say, I'm storing the suckers to hopefully get published in real places. Plus they're all too long to put on here. So for now, a few blurbs of things that may or may not end up in essay format:

* I finally got a job. Needless to say it was from the job interview that involved drama games. My inner flaming drama student shined. There were jazz hands. Eyes were scalded into submission. This summer I'll be working at a department store accessory counter. All names omitted for fears of Googling (see below) but  available on request. Let's just say you'll come for the bitchy dismissal of your ensemble, but you'll stay because we refuse to serve you.

*I actually almost lost said job before getting it. It's a long and complicated story, the main theme of which is that telling the truth is the worst thing you can possibly do. I'm writing it up now. Trying to fit in a charming aside to Brookside Shopping village. FYI the week I was there, two drunks had defecated in the Myer change rooms. Spiffy.

*Said job is going to be a goldmine of stories. Can you say "Boxing Day Sales" ? Can you also say, "elbowed in the face for a pair of  half-price peach slacks?" Hope to see you there!

* I went to Wet'n'Wild with my family. It was great. Really. I know people have had a bit lollfest over it (Yes, I do know, you people) . Although did you know the Wave Pool now has a safety fence along the "shoreline"? There's nothing wilder than lining up single file to go swimming.