Movie Trailer: #Chronicle

Maybe it's because I'm re-reading Akira, but this trailer gave me chills, rip-off or no rip-off. What can I say? - I'm a sucker for handy-cam "diary" movies. Yes, Cloverfield included. Also Paranormal Activity - p.s. does anyone else love how at the end of number 2 the family transfer the ghost to the wife's OWN SISTER? At least with the Ring video-tape you could just fob it off on some stranger.

Chronicle comes out February 2nd.

Movies: Drive and Las Acacias

There's not much more to be said about Drive. It's awesome. It also has one of the best movie soundtracks of the year. Not to mention the best titles. Who knew Mistral font would ever be sexy again?

I only managed to see one film at the Brisbane International Film Festival this year. I know right? Who knows what happened there. Oh yes, I'm dish rag poor, that's what.

Anyhoodle, thanks to a good friend I got one freeby. It was "Las Acacias" , the debut film by Argentinian director Pablo Giorgelli.

Yep, it is slow and almost entirely truck-based viewing. It's also a simple story told with great focus and sensitivity. Don't go on a Friday. Go on a Sunday when you're tired or hungover or coming down from Heaven-knows-what. It'll make you blubber your wussy face off with joy.

Movies: My Romantic Weekend.

Anna Farris and flaming weave.

While it doesn’t have any sex scenes, What’s Your Number? was still a pretty awkward movie to see with my mother. Oddly even more so than Bridesmaids, which coincidentally shares an identical opening sequence: albeit with a lot more humping. For the record the most awkward movie experience I shared with my parents is Lust/Caution which as far as I can remember had a sex scene that went for three hours.

What’s Your Number is pretty awkward all around. Some of the jokes fall flat and the film’s message— that boys can sleep around and girls can’t—while saved in the end, is still pretty gross. The scenes where the girls discuss how many flings they’ve had is painful to watch. It’s saved only by Anna Farris. If you like Farris, see this movie, if not, don’t. Chris Evans (Captain America) brings the requisite eye candy and likeability to his role, although his musician chops are doubtable, even while in underwear. Although Mum didn’t mind.

After that came Crazy, Stupid, Love. which also had no sex scenes but much “flubber”, provided by the Natalie Portman of now (i.e. in everything), Ryan Gosling. The film is directed by same pair who made the excellent I Love You Philip Morris, made years ago but only released in Oz earlier this year.

This film is the better of the pair. It does a nice job of appearing messy and true to life while still satisfying our urges for Hollywood happy endings and shopping montages.   The soundtrack, which features local (now defunct) band The Middle East, is also excellent.
           
It should also be mentioned that I was subjected to the horror that is Dreamgirls, aka “two hours of black ladies shriek-singing.”

HAPPY MONDAY!

Movies: Captain America (an internal monologue)

"Well that's some nice sepia-tone. Oh Chris Evan's head looks weird superimposed on that body, dislocated, like the heads of bobble-dogs you used to see in people's cars (that was a hectic grass-fire of a craze, wasn't it?). That's some pretty retro-futurist details you've got there, but isn't Tony Stark Iron Man? and Isn't Iron man Robert Downey Jr. Am I lacking the dweeb credentials on this? Should I care?

Movies: The Last Wave

Aside from a lacklustre climax, this film was fantastic. We don't have enough apocalyptic thrillers in Australia. Or movies that tackle similar issues without coming off as didactic. And yep, its from Peter Weir, the director of Picnic at Hanging Rock.

Reading: Zombie Economics

But first I've got to upload this video:

It's the teaser trailer (featuring the soundtrack from Moon, FYI) of the new film about Margaret Thatcher, The Iron Lady. I think Meryl Streep is getting to that stage of celebrity where I all I see is her (similar to Johnny Depp), which means all I do while watching is mentally coo "oh Meryl!" . Still, this trailer is pretty amazing, I'm pretty sure I'll copy it at some point - " You can keep the change, but putting my yoghurt in a bag is ABSOLUTELY NON-NEGOTIABLE!"

Anyhoo. It relates BECAUSE I watched it right after finishing this book:

I am DISGUSTED I haven't seen this......YET

AND did anyone else see that amazing video-art where they spliced this movie and other horror movies together using amazing effects? Anyone?  No? Well then, back to my basement......

Movies; Snowtown

Twenty-minutes into Snowtown and I was checking my watch. Seeing as it had already covered most of the Australian movie clichés; gritty visuals, still shots of morose people, endless smoking, unfocussed shots of household objects I was curious to see how it would fill the remaining two hours.  There came the requisite rape, assault, murder (of both man and animal), paedophilia, homophobia, in between endless scenes where nothing happens.

I feel compelled to write something. The film has been receiving ‘rave’ reviews everywhere else. It is terrible. Not only is it boring, it’s insulting to its subject, to movie goers and Australians in general.

Movies: The Hangover 2

The Hangover 2 will appeal to anyone who's got hazy memories of Thailand, that dirt-cheap Mecca for the first time traveller and the red-faced sleaze. There’s something for everyone, and then some.

We open at a resort in the tropical idyll of the country’s south. This time it’s Stu (Ed Helms) who’s getting married, albeit with a hitch. Following another literally mind-blowing night out—featuring the shameless Mr. Chow from the original—Stu and the boys (Bradley Cooper and Zack Galifianakis) come to. This is no paradise. This is Bangkok, and the boys are down one man—the bride-to-be’s younger brother.

What follows is a messy and tasteless tumble around the slums and peaks of Asia’s red-light capital. Almost every sleaze ‘to-do’ is covered, easily filling the films gross out quotient. Alan (Galifianakis) gains enlightenment via a booze hungry octogenarian monk, although most of those scenes fall flat. 

Director Todd Philips is best at buddy-buddy relationships. The quiet scenes between the men are nicely played; walking the fine line between comedic and genuine. The formula may wear thin, but the change of scene is enough to save it. So go and re-live your own blurry Bangkok memories, Hangover style.

Movies: Thirst (2009)

This trailer does not do this movie justice. Thirst, by Park-Chan wook (Oldboy.Yep, that's the one where the guy eats the squid) is more than a vampire movie. It's ironic and absurd and hillarious. It is no-where near as dank as this trailer makes it out to be.The set design is quirky and the cinematography is fantastic, much better than the washed out, gritty look of other horror films.

As for story, this movie is the anti-Twilight. These people shouldn't have gone out for a week, let alone be stuck together for all eternity. He survives by sipping on coma patients, she pops aortas with sewing-scissors. It was never going to work. The closing sequence is a quarrel between the two, executed using slapstick violence and almost no noise. It's tragic- you'll laugh. It's brilliant.

Movies: Pirates of the Caribbean; something something something

Every year a friend of mine takes his Grandmother to see The Pirates of Penzance perform. For those of you not big on the pantomime matinee scene, it is  an annual tour of singing/dancing/kitsch.

This strikes me as a very sweet and incredibly boring activity. 'Oh, it's not too bad.' this friend will say, 'I mean, they change it.' When I ask how, their eyes gain that unfocussed squint you get from staring into Amazing 3D Paintings. You're sure there's something there, but what?

I imagine the experience is not unlike seeing the new Pirates of the Caribbean movie. You go to see it, well, because it’s out. Sequels like this are the cinematic equivalent of doing the laundry. It’s what you do.

Movies: Source Code

It’s easy to complain about the gaps in Source Code’s logic. Any plot dealing with metaphysics, quantum physics and alternate realities simultaneously is bound to have a few issues. But like that quirky friend with a few behavioural blind-spots, we forgive them because they’re so damn amusing.

Movies: Thor

In every way, Thor is a big-screen movie and one of the only movies that makes 3D seem worth all the hoopla. Not only are the visuals stunning—the opening swoop over the otherworldly Asgard is worth admission alone—the actors have the grandeur to match. Chris Hemsworth (that’s Kim Hyde from Home and Away to you) has the chops to portray the Marvel Comic hero. Arrogant yet affable, dangerous yet vulnerable ‘future king of the nine realms.’ Hemsworth chews up the screen like he does his words—as if he were hoeing into a side of mutton. It sounds gross, but it works. The entire cast manages to scale the heights of an epic story. Even Thor’s friends—a kind of supernatural superfriends—manage to provide comedic relief without the typical cringe-factor.

Make a few jokes, spill a little blood.

- Courteny Cox in Scre4m - scary and funny. In more ways than one.

Twenty minutes into Scre4m and the blood level is rising fast –theirs, not mine. This is a horror movie, and the nubile-bodies are piling fast. Except then I’m watching Sheriff Dwayne (David Arquette) quibbling with his smitten Deputy (Marley Shelton) over her lemon slice. ‘You’re not cheating on your wife if you eat a lemon square,’ she gushes, looking like a bug eyed Heather Graham. ‘No. But it would be cheating on my diet,’ Dwayne quips. You expect a light hearted musical flourish; instead it’s the radio call reporting a couple of slashed up teens. It’s then that it hit me, Scre4m is funny. Not only that, it’s meant to be funny.

We’ve grown unaccustomed to comedy in horror movies. The most popular series (the Saw, Ring, and Hostel series) are perpetually murky and dread-filled. Whatever jokes are had are often lousy, and almost always at the victims expense. These films are referenced in Scre4m, almost always by the characters themselves. Everyone is clued in and media saturated. Director Wes Craven opens the movie with a beautiful woman complaining about metatextuality and sexism in horror films, moments before getting brutally shivved.

The film follows the people of Woodsboro on the anniversary of the original murders, aka Scream One. Sidney Prescott (Neve Campbell) is back in town to release a book, titled Out of Darkness, which details her overcoming her traumatic past. There’s no evidence of that here. Campbell spends most of the film looking downtrodden, her hang-dog eyes wincing out tears while carnage ensues. So basically, she the same as in every other Scream movie.

Is it scary? Yes and no. There’s only so many ways to stick a teen, especially in the Scream series, which is limited to a hunting knife and that melted-ghost mask. What makes it work is the sharp script by Kevin Williamson. Comedy makes the horror more, well, horrifying. Scenes with the shrill and domineering Sheriff’s wife (Courteney Cox, who in one fantastic scene tells Deputy Hicks her lemon slices, ‘Taste like ass.’), or spunky film buff Kirby (Hayden Pannetiere) almost make you forget there’s a serial killer on the loose—until that phone starts ringing...

In Scre4m, everyone is in on the joke. Teen audiences can enjoy the near grovelling at their technical savvy—everything is uploading, streaming, Tweeting and sms-ing—while everyone else can quietly relish seeing their screen-doubles getting mercilessly stalked and murdered. Plus there’s a slew of movie references and cameos to enjoy. Sure it’s cheesy and overdone in places— it’s supposed to be. Even the victims know that. But they’re all having a great time, right up until the knife drops. That is everyone except weepy-eyed Sidney Prescott, who I’m sure is praying the series doesn’t get a Saw-esque re-tool for Scream 5. Sure that’s a spoiler, but if you’re shocked to learn she survives, you haven’t been paying attention.